Help Kids Learn How to De-Stress and Exit the Red Zone
I had a great moment as a parent last week. After school, my wife and I were walking home with our two boys and chatting about the day. My 7-year-old son was telling us that a couple kids in his class made another student sad, and she walked off upset. My son walked over to find her, and found her crying. This is the conversation that followed:
My 7-year-old son: “I found her crying, and I helped make her feel better.”
Me: “Awesome buddy, how did you do that?”
My 7-year-old son: “I told her to slow down her breathing and take big breaths in through her nose and big breaths out of her mouth.”
Me: “Amazing work buddy, we are really proud of you for helping your friend feel better when she was upset.”
This is a prime example of children understanding what we teach them, and applying what they learn. As parents, we stress the importance of being able to calm down in the moment when feeling frustrated, anxious, upset, or stressed. We practice this style of breathing with them when they need it, and we show them that we use this style of breathing too so they will want to emulate us. It all starts with a conversation, it continues with practice, and it sticks with repetition. Below you will find our health recipe with the type of breathing that will calm you down in the moment the fastest. Use it yourself, use it with your kids, use it with your grandkids and see the beneifts work for everyone. Have a great week, happy breathing, and talk next week.
Breathe Stress Away in Three Breaths
Physiological Sigh
Timing: 0.5–2 minutes
Level of Difficulty: Easy (no learning required)
Serving Size: A few breath cycles when feeling stressed
Spice Level: Mild and calming
INGREDIENTS
You and your breath
REASONING AND BENEFITS
When we think about reducing stress, we often think of going for a massage, meditating, taking a break, or going on a vacation. What about reducing stress the moment it’s happening? The physiological sigh is a quick, in-the-moment stress reduction strategy. This technique allows you to use your physiology to calm yourself down. The sigh is something humans and animals automatically do before falling asleep. What better way to calm down than to do what your body already does before you fall asleep? It is very hard for us to calm down using our minds. Telling ourselves to calm down can make us more stressed, especially if it isn’t working. Instead of using your mind, use what your body is already trained to use to calm down: your breath. When we get stressed, carbon dioxide builds up in our blood, and the alveoli sacs in our lungs collapse like deflated balls. The double inhale acts as a pump and reinflates the alveoli sacs so that they can get rid of built-up carbon dioxide. After you reinflate the alveoli sacs, a long exhale will be much more effective at getting rid of the built-up carbon dioxide, relaxing your mind and body (Huberman, ep. 10).
INSTRUCTIONS
Take a full breath in through your nose then immediately inhale again (called a double inhale).
Perform a long exhale out your mouth. Longer exhales slow down your heart rate.
Repeat even just one to three times to notice a benefit.
Repeat as much as you’d like to feel the calmness you’ve been searching for.
PRO TIP: We have both used this during stressful moments at work when we need to be calm and make quick decisions. We highly recommend the physiological sigh as a strategy to let your body recognize how to limit the stress response in the moment.
* The physiological sigh is thoroughly grounded in physiology and neuroscience as the most effective way to calm down.
**The diaphragm is a bad$&@ organ because it is one that we can control through our breath.
***The physiological sigh is the fastest hard-wired way for us to eliminate the stress response in our body in real time.
